I love what Deb said in this article! As I have traveled the world helping leaders develop their emotional-social skills, I have championed making friends at work. Doing so makes a huge difference in our happiness, emotional well-being, productivity, and desire to stay at a job. With loneliness being a significant problem, work affords an opportunity to build those much-needed human connections. Like Deb, I have built many meaningful, life-long friends at work, and we are all better for it.
I love this and agree that we spend so much time at work, it’s nice to build relationships. As a leader, how do you balance having executive presence with making friends?
Thank you for including the photos. Not only was it great to see some familiar faces, I love the connection from the 2003 photo to the recent one.
I’m glad I’ve made friends at work, and it always felt natural at PayPal. I keep in touch with so many colleagues (or, subscribe to their Substacks!) I think the hardest thing about making friends at work is the fear of the company rejecting you or them. I’ve never felt competitive with people I work with, but it always bothered me to think about the conversations that go on behind closed doors, in the calibration sessions, when people’s performances were being compared by managers. I understand now why it’s like that, but it’s one of the things about working at a company that makes people feel less inclined to open up, be friends, act genuinely. The “performance curve” that hangs over all of us can be daunting… perhaps that is one reason why some people aren’t as ready to make friends at work.
I love your writing, Deb! Always thoughtful and genuine!
I love what Deb said in this article! As I have traveled the world helping leaders develop their emotional-social skills, I have championed making friends at work. Doing so makes a huge difference in our happiness, emotional well-being, productivity, and desire to stay at a job. With loneliness being a significant problem, work affords an opportunity to build those much-needed human connections. Like Deb, I have built many meaningful, life-long friends at work, and we are all better for it.
sending this to my work friends :D
I found my best friend at work! I've written about it here: https://substack.com/@sj122/p-186953688
I love this and agree that we spend so much time at work, it’s nice to build relationships. As a leader, how do you balance having executive presence with making friends?
Love this piece! Especially this sentence “Friendship is built in the spaces between the formal moments..”
Lots of familiar (and friendly) faces!
Completely agree with this. I met so many of my close friends through work and am so grateful to have them in my life.
Thank you for including the photos. Not only was it great to see some familiar faces, I love the connection from the 2003 photo to the recent one.
I’m glad I’ve made friends at work, and it always felt natural at PayPal. I keep in touch with so many colleagues (or, subscribe to their Substacks!) I think the hardest thing about making friends at work is the fear of the company rejecting you or them. I’ve never felt competitive with people I work with, but it always bothered me to think about the conversations that go on behind closed doors, in the calibration sessions, when people’s performances were being compared by managers. I understand now why it’s like that, but it’s one of the things about working at a company that makes people feel less inclined to open up, be friends, act genuinely. The “performance curve” that hangs over all of us can be daunting… perhaps that is one reason why some people aren’t as ready to make friends at work.
I love your writing, Deb! Always thoughtful and genuine!