I lost my dad last summer in a horrific way and the grief has been overwhelming. I found a children’s book called tear soup that was really on point in describing the individual journey of grief - I highly recommend it. Sending you so much love - your memories of your mom are just beautiful. She sounds like a remarkable person - thank you for sharing that with us.
Wow, thank you for the advice on supporting people experiencing grief. While I haven't experienced losing a parent, I got emotional reading this piece as someone who has been through grief in some other way.
I totally resonate with support being specific and people taking initiative. Within hours of a loved one's death, the best thing someone could have ever done for me was show up on my door step, packed my clothes, and brought me to their place because I couldn't spend the night alone in my apartment. I was too shell shocked to articulate how to be best supported so this is what I needed.
Tears stream down my face as I read this heartfelt post. *hugs* A knot in my throat formed trying to think of what to say. Griefing is a process and it emotions just seem to take over when memories come to mind. Sadly, I have attended 5 funerals in the last 6 months and it doesn't get easier. Planning for them does, but the grief will always be there. Keep your memories. Ziplock her fav sweater and smell it from time to time. Hoping you and your family find comfort soon.
When my in-laws passed, my husband decided to keep his parent's robes. I look at them from time to time and think of them.
My mom's room is still a time capsule that I slowly clear each day for just a few minutes. It is like I can close my eyes and imagine her still there with me.
My sincerest condolences to you and your family for your loss! What a lovely tribute to your Mum, and every word seemed to speak to me as I too lost my Mum last October - suddenly and quite unexpectedly when I was still chatting with her at my parent’s home just two hours before it happened (quickly and without warning).
As you said, everyone grieved differently, but I do agree getting support of friends and family are key to making this process a little easier.I am sure your Mum had so much treasured her time with you. Take care!
I asked my friends whose parents passed suddenly, and most of them seem to feel like there is unfinished business. I am glad I had a chance to say goodbye in my own way even though I could never be quite ready to let her go.
I am so, so sorry for your loss, and I am grateful that you've shared this part of your life with us. I lost my dad 10 years ago and now my mom is living with stage IV cancer. I'll never forget the coworker that saw I couldn't function after my dad's passing, and helped me. And the boss who was truly there for me when my mom got diagnosed. I often tell my teams that we're building software 'with people, in service of people.' Let us not forget that we're human.
Thank you for sharing this story and what a wonderful tribute to your mum. May she live on in your memory. I lost my dad more than a year ago, and it was only recently that I finally processed the grief. I've also just wrote about it.
I am so sorry for the loss of your mother and your in-laws, particularly in such a short span of time. Such a touching tribute to her and your family. Wishing you and your family comfort and peace.
My sincere condolences to you and your family. It is clear from reading your essay what a special relationship you had with your mom. I am sure she felt loved and embraced by your family throughout her illness and during her final days.
Thanks for sharing Deb, great reflection on life’s most difficult journey. Sorry for your mom’s passing and I admire all the great time you and David and your kids had with your mom. She sounds like a wonderful person. Grief is hard and your sharing is helpful to us all.
Such beautiful words and thank you for sharing your vulnerability, grief and lessons on how we can help people who are grieving. You were lucky to have your mom, and she was lucky to have you. May her memory always be a blessing for you, Deb!
Thank you for sharing your experience with loss and grief, so soon after your Mom's passing. I am so sorry for your loss, and for your other recent losses. I loved your Mom's life in pictures. Thank you for sharing - her spirit comes through fully. I'm impressed by the fortitude it takes to immigrate and build a rich life.
Deb - I’m so sorry for your loss. Tears came down while I read this piece. I felt the deep grief… Thank you for writing this piece. Again I’ve learned something important from you.
Hi Deb, I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with grief recently. I lost my dad during Covid. I couldn’t sleep for many days, because the fact was to hard to accept. I totally can feel your feelings.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I always find inspiration from your articles. It helps me tremendously!
I lost my dad last summer in a horrific way and the grief has been overwhelming. I found a children’s book called tear soup that was really on point in describing the individual journey of grief - I highly recommend it. Sending you so much love - your memories of your mom are just beautiful. She sounds like a remarkable person - thank you for sharing that with us.
I am so sorry for your loss! Hugs.
Wow, thank you for the advice on supporting people experiencing grief. While I haven't experienced losing a parent, I got emotional reading this piece as someone who has been through grief in some other way.
I totally resonate with support being specific and people taking initiative. Within hours of a loved one's death, the best thing someone could have ever done for me was show up on my door step, packed my clothes, and brought me to their place because I couldn't spend the night alone in my apartment. I was too shell shocked to articulate how to be best supported so this is what I needed.
Tears stream down my face as I read this heartfelt post. *hugs* A knot in my throat formed trying to think of what to say. Griefing is a process and it emotions just seem to take over when memories come to mind. Sadly, I have attended 5 funerals in the last 6 months and it doesn't get easier. Planning for them does, but the grief will always be there. Keep your memories. Ziplock her fav sweater and smell it from time to time. Hoping you and your family find comfort soon.
I am so sorry for your losses.
When my in-laws passed, my husband decided to keep his parent's robes. I look at them from time to time and think of them.
My mom's room is still a time capsule that I slowly clear each day for just a few minutes. It is like I can close my eyes and imagine her still there with me.
My sincerest condolences to you and your family for your loss! What a lovely tribute to your Mum, and every word seemed to speak to me as I too lost my Mum last October - suddenly and quite unexpectedly when I was still chatting with her at my parent’s home just two hours before it happened (quickly and without warning).
As you said, everyone grieved differently, but I do agree getting support of friends and family are key to making this process a little easier.I am sure your Mum had so much treasured her time with you. Take care!
I asked my friends whose parents passed suddenly, and most of them seem to feel like there is unfinished business. I am glad I had a chance to say goodbye in my own way even though I could never be quite ready to let her go.
I believed my Mum has gone to a better place, and there is a time for everything. But I am glad you had the chance to say goodbye.
I am so, so sorry for your loss, and I am grateful that you've shared this part of your life with us. I lost my dad 10 years ago and now my mom is living with stage IV cancer. I'll never forget the coworker that saw I couldn't function after my dad's passing, and helped me. And the boss who was truly there for me when my mom got diagnosed. I often tell my teams that we're building software 'with people, in service of people.' Let us not forget that we're human.
Thank you for sharing this story and what a wonderful tribute to your mum. May she live on in your memory. I lost my dad more than a year ago, and it was only recently that I finally processed the grief. I've also just wrote about it.
I am so sorry for the loss of your mother and your in-laws, particularly in such a short span of time. Such a touching tribute to her and your family. Wishing you and your family comfort and peace.
My sincere condolences to you and your family. It is clear from reading your essay what a special relationship you had with your mom. I am sure she felt loved and embraced by your family throughout her illness and during her final days.
May her memory be a blessing.
What a powerful post.
Thanks for sharing Deb, great reflection on life’s most difficult journey. Sorry for your mom’s passing and I admire all the great time you and David and your kids had with your mom. She sounds like a wonderful person. Grief is hard and your sharing is helpful to us all.
Such beautiful words and thank you for sharing your vulnerability, grief and lessons on how we can help people who are grieving. You were lucky to have your mom, and she was lucky to have you. May her memory always be a blessing for you, Deb!
Thank you for sharing your experience with loss and grief, so soon after your Mom's passing. I am so sorry for your loss, and for your other recent losses. I loved your Mom's life in pictures. Thank you for sharing - her spirit comes through fully. I'm impressed by the fortitude it takes to immigrate and build a rich life.
Hi Deb, I only know you through your writing and our mutual common connections but I've been impacted by your work and I'm deeply sorry for your loss.
Deb - I’m so sorry for your loss. Tears came down while I read this piece. I felt the deep grief… Thank you for writing this piece. Again I’ve learned something important from you.
Deb - Sorry for your loss. And thank you for taking time to write about it with your true, authentic voice.
I've also enjoyed reading your joint article with your daughter and hearing her perspective on this.
Hi Deb, I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with grief recently. I lost my dad during Covid. I couldn’t sleep for many days, because the fact was to hard to accept. I totally can feel your feelings.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I always find inspiration from your articles. It helps me tremendously!
Sending virtual hugs to you.